Remembering Stu

Stu was one of the most self-disciplined, ambitious and kind-hearted people you could ever meet. He always put others before himself and had a deep sense of doing what was right. He cared deeply about the people around him and lived his life with purpose, determination and an incredible amount of energy.

At just 36 years old, Stu was at the gym — somewhere he spent a huge amount of his time — when he tragically suffered a brain haemorrhage caused by an undiagnosed arteriovenous malformation (AVM).

He was rushed to hospital and, after agonising hours waiting to understand what had happened, our family was given the unbearable news that Stu was not going to pull through.

None of us had ever heard of an AVM before. When we were told how rare they were, we struggled to understand how something we had never even heard of could have taken Stu from us so suddenly. There had been no warning and no indication that anything was wrong.

For something like this to happen to the healthiest person we knew has only added to the shock and disbelief. Stu looked after himself, exercised constantly and had an incredible knowledge of health and fitness. His story has shown us, in the most devastating way possible, that an AVM can affect anyone, at any time, regardless of how healthy they appear to be.

A natural sportsman

From a young age, Stu had an incredible talent for sport. At school, he was a well-known personality and a genuine sports star. Whatever sport he turned his hand to, he seemed to excel.

Football was one of his biggest passions, and his ability was recognised from an early age, travelling all over the country playing at a high level. He was so incredibly talented he even attended schoolboy trials for England, something that was an enormous achievement and a reflection of just how great he was.

Tennis was another sport where Stu really excelled. He won countless trophies throughout his playing days and was incredibly competitive. Whether it was tennis, football, cricket or cycling with his Dad. Stu always gave it everything he had and was determined to be the best.

Some of our fondest memories, however, aren’t necessarily the trophies or sporting achievements. They are the ordinary moments from growing up together — hours spent playing FIFA, collecting football stickers, and running around the playing fields having fun. They were simple childhood memories, but they are the moments that stay with us and that we will treasure forever.

His determination never changed

Stu went on to study at Sheffield Hallam University before building a successful career, first as a personal trainer and then moving into recruitment. The same determination and ambition that had made him such a talented sportsman followed him into his professional life.

He worked hard, set himself high standards and was incredibly driven. He was successful in his career, but never lost the qualities that made people enjoy being around him. He remained generous with his time, willing to help others and always keen to share his knowledge and experience.

Anyone who knew Stu will also tell you that one of his favourite places to be was the gym. He went most days and had an almost endless knowledge of health and fitness. He was constantly learning, researching and looking for ways to improve himself, and he loved sharing what he knew with the people around him.

The person behind it all

But beyond the sporting achievements, the career and the incredible discipline, what we remember most about Stu is the person he was.

His sense of humour was one of the things that made him so special. He never took life too seriously and was always up for a laugh. He was great company and had a way of making people feel comfortable. He brought energy, humour and fun wherever he went.

He also had an incredibly strong sense of doing the right thing and putting other people first. Perhaps nothing demonstrates that more than a decision he made years before his death.

Stu had voluntarily registered to become an organ donor. At the time, it wasn’t something many people his age thought about, but that decision ultimately went on to save the lives of three other people.

Following Stu’s death, his liver was donated to one person and his kidneys to two others. Three people were given the gift of life because of Stu — an incredible final act of generosity from someone who spent his life putting others before himself.

Knowing that Stu has given three other people the opportunity to continue their lives gives our family some comfort in the midst of an otherwise unimaginable loss. It is an incredible part of his legacy, and something we will always be immensely proud of.

The bond between siblings

Stu, James and Jodie shared a bond that was incredibly special.

Like many siblings, we grew up together, argued, laughed and made countless memories, but there was something particularly unique about the connection between the three of us. No matter how much time had passed since we had last seen each other, whenever we came together it felt as though we had never been apart.

We had a shared sense of humour that was almost impossible to explain to anyone else. There were jokes, looks, comments and ridiculous moments that only the three of us understood. Sometimes we didn’t even need to say anything — one look was enough to set the others off laughing.

That connection was something we never took for granted, but losing Stu has made us realise just how precious it was.

We will always have those memories of being together as children, the stupid things we laughed about, the games, the arguments, the adventures and all the moments that only siblings can truly understand. Those memories are now some of the most precious things we have. At school he made

us instantly popular due to our big bro being so well loved. Stu wasn’t just our brother. He was one of our best friends, and the bond between the three of us will never disappear.

Stu was also step brother to Chris & Rich, relationships that seemed to come so naturally and we will never forget the family holidays when we all spent precious time together.

Furthermore, Stu always kept a very close relationship with Mum and step dad Terry, always there for Sunday dinner (Mum does it best). Stu would regularly confide in Mum with even the most personal things in life.

Forever and always

Words cannot describe how much Stu is missed. His loss has left an enormous hole in the lives of his family, friends and colleagues — a hole that will never truly be filled.

Five months on, we still miss him every single day. We think about him constantly, talk about him often and continue to remember all of the things that made him who he was — the sportsman, the competitor, the professional, the joker, the brother, the son, the friend and, above all, the incredibly kind person he was.

We will always remember the little things: the FIFA games, running around the fields, the endless sporting competitions, the laughter, the gym sessions, nights out and all the memories that made growing up with Stu so special.

We will remember his ambition, his discipline, his kindness and his incredible ability to make people laugh making those around him feel better.

We love you very much Stu and can’t believe you’re no longer here. We miss you every day.
Forever and always.